


Me Before You

by boltshok



Series: Landguard + Icefall [in-universe chronological order] [3]
Category: Transformers - All Media Types
Genre: Developing Relationship, First Love, Flashbacks, Forbidden Love, M/M, Past Relationship(s), Sticky Sexual Interfacing, Tactile Sexual Interfacing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-09
Updated: 2020-05-09
Packaged: 2021-03-02 23:14:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,276
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24094924
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boltshok/pseuds/boltshok
Summary: “Can I ask about... your last relationship?”“I suppose it’s about time.”
Relationships: Icefall (OC)/Landguard (OC), Landguard (OC)/Judge (OC) (past)
Series: Landguard + Icefall [in-universe chronological order] [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1650709
Kudos: 1





	Me Before You

“Guard.”

Icefall’s whisper stirred Landguard from his gentle dozing, and he onlined his systems and opened his optics to look across the berth at Icefall. He had rolled away from Landguard to face him, optics taking in his features.

“Hmm?”

“Can I ask about... your last relationship?” Icefall’s voice became very small by the time he finished speaking. 

Landguard looks down, then slowly looks back up. “I suppose it’s about time.”

“You don’t have to,” Icefall says, reaching out with some hesitation to brush his fingertips down Landguard’s chest. “I’m... curious, but... don’t want to pry.”

“It’s deep in the bond,” Landguard murmurs. “But you should know.”

Landguard reaches for Icefall’s hand and draws it up to kiss his knuckles. After a moment’s hesitation, he bows his helm and then props it up on his elbow. 

“I’ll tell it from the beginning,” he says. “Before I worked at the parlor, I had lessons every day. You’ve never been to the estate, but there are extensive gardens around the entire property, and on the rooftops, everywhere. And after I took lessons, I would go out to the garden and listen to the parrots.”

“Sometimes, when I was out there in the gardens the help would come by. They— he— would trim the cyberflora and sometimes he’d... talk to me.”

As much as he tried to suppress it, he couldn’t keep the memories at bay once he began dredging them up.

_ “Hey, young sir.” _

_ The parrots nearest Landguard looked up and then flew off, leaving him alone with the gardener. Landguard watched them go before he regarded the gardener, a barely hidden smile on his face. _

_ “You could just call me Landguard.” _

_ “And miss that silly look? Naw.” _

“His name was Richterburst, but everyone called him Judge. Said his name was—”

_ “Too long’n too much. Plus, Imma good judge’a character.” _

“The first few times were nothing. We just sat, and talked, and he was so kind. Honest. But the longer we met, the longer we talked, until he touched me. And it didn’t burn.”

“What did it feel like?”

_ “I’m not hurting ya, am I? I heard you got some kinda... touch thing.” _

_ “No... you feel like... the plants.” _

“It was nice. For the first time, I was touching someone who didn’t hurt. Didn’t... burn.”

_ “Can I kiss ya?” _

_ “ _ _ Should... should we do this?” _

_ “Do you want to?” _

_ Heated breaths passed between them, and Landguard leaned closer. _

_ “I do. I do.” _

_ The first kiss clung to his lips, almost cloying in carefulness. The next was gentle too, and Landguard’s processor slowly went blank. Everything centered around the next kiss, and the next, until they were a chain unraveling faster than he could consider. His frame was heating, his fans were spinning, and before he knew what was happening his modesty plating was pinging to open.  _

_ “Ya ever been with somebody?”  _

_ “Been with someone? You mean... interfacing?” _

_ “Yeah.” _

_ “...no, I haven’t. Haven’t... met anyone.” _

_ “You wanna be with me?” _

_ “...yes.” _

_ “Alright. Come with me to the back gardens. No one’ll find us there.” _

“He was very tender,” Landguard says, rolling over onto his back to stare up at the ceiling. Anything to be out of the direct reach of Icefall’s bright, piercing optics. He was attentive without even trying.

_ He helped Landguard lay among the cyberflora, spongy growth medium cushioning his frame, conforming to the edges of his armor.  _

_ “Since this’s yer first time, I want it to be good,” Judge said, sitting on the wall next to Landguard. “Always wanna use yer mouth on a newbie.” _

_ “Your... mouth?” _

_ “Yeah, I’ll show ya,” Judge murmured, bending to kiss his thigh. “Wanna open yer panels, sweet thing?” _

_ After a moment’s hesitation, Landguard opens both sets of his panels. His spike rises above his hips, hard and desperate for touch. His valve was lubricating freely, and Judge took a moment to look him over before rolling up into the florabed with him. _

_ “If’n ya want me to stop, jus’ say,” Judge murmurs, “it’s okay if ya do, no hard feelings.” _

_ “I want it,” Landguard whispers, and Judge flashes him a reassuring, crooked smile before he puts his hands on Landguard’s thighs, slides them under and slowly pushes his legs up until his knees are bent and his array fully exposed. _

_ “Alright,” Judge said, slowly lowering his helm to brush another kiss to Landguard’s leg, closer to his array. “Try not’n be too loud, now. Jus’ in case.” _

_ Landguard nodded, glancing up to watch Judge lower his mouth to his array. Warmth, sweet warmth, and... coolness, the brush of leaves, filled his core when Judge took a leisurely taste of his array. _

_ “Ohhh,” Landguard whispered, optics closing as his helm fell back and his thighs closed on Judge’s helm. He reached for and found his helm, hands trembling. “I- Judge, Judge, wait—” _

_ He pulled back, Landguard’s grip loosening. “What?” _

_ “Is... is it supposed to feel that good?” _

_ Judge gave him a sweet, lopsided smile. “Yeah. It is.” _

_ “Oh,” Landguard breathed. “Would you do it... again?” _

_ “I’m gonna do it ‘til yer done,” Judge said, rubbing Landguard’s leg with simple reassurance. “It’s okay.” _

_ When he lowered his helm again, Landguard sighed and sank into the substrate, hips moving of their own accord in Judge’s gentle grasp. Even though Landguard was slightly larger, taller really, than Judge, his frame wasn’t fully developed and was significantly weaker. Judge’s worn arms and plain armor betrayed his age but also the usage of his frame as a working-caste mech.  _

_ He sucked on Landguard’s node in an open-mouthed, wet kiss, glossa wet and squirming and making the sweetest connections in his neural net. When his tongue slipped into Landguard’s valve, teasing the rim and any sensors near it, Landguard could have sworn his spike nearly burst. He’d touched himself before, but it was nothing like this. That was just rudimentary spike-play, nothing like this gentle, all-encompassing warmth.  _

_ He felt the draw of an overload only moments before it happened. _

_ “I... I’m...” he whimpers, and Judge glances up at him and Landguard could have sworn his optics smiled at him.  _

_ He overloaded. _

_ Fist pressed to his mouth, he bit down on the largest knuckle and whimpered out his climax while Judge held him close without pulling away. The last flutters of Landguard’s valve fade after several long moments, and only then did Judge ease back. He laid down next to Landguard and drew him into his arms. _

_ “Was that good?” _

_ “Yeah,” Landguard managed, pleasure still burning through the newly activated pathways in his neural net. “Never... never felt like that before.” _

_ Judge petted his helm gently before returning his arm to the embrace. “ ‘M glad I could make ya feel it, then.” _

It was only then that Landguard realized he had stopped talking and the memory in its entirety had just played out for Icefall through the bond. Hot embarrassment and shame bubbles up within him and he sits up abruptly.

“Sorry,” he says, shielding his optics with his hand. “Shouldn’t have— just—”

Icefall reaches for him and puts his hand on Landguard’s arm. “It’s okay, Landguard, it’s okay. Your memories are fine. It’s good to keep happy memories, I’m glad you shared it with me.”

Landguard frowns and turns away, but lowers his hand to retake Icefall’s.

_ “How... how do I make you feel like that? Do I use... my mouth?” _

_ “That’s another task for another cycle, sweet one,” Judge said, pressing a kiss to the top of Landguard’s helm. “I jus’ wanna enjoy what ya felt right now.” _

“He was always tender,” Landguard mutters, still reminiscing. “I’ll just... show it to you, but that’s it. It’s... bittersweet.”

Icefall’s hand squeezes his.

_ “We hafta be quiet, Landguard,” Judge murmured, pulling him into the supply shed. “Don’t want nobody ta hear us.” _

_ “Hear us?” _

_ “Jus’ in case it gets loud,” Judge said, putting his hand on Landguard’s waist. “Imma show ya what I like.” _

_ Landguard perked up when Judge took his breastplate off and set it aside to reveal bundles of smooth wire underneath, dotted with bits of cybermatter. _

_ “They’re here,” he said, running his fingers over two groups of wires. The longer he petted them the more evenly the wires laid until two glowing nodes were revealed. _

_ “These are neural net clusters,” Judge explained, and Landguard leaned in, studying the two small, glowing bundles. “An’ touchin’ ‘em feels good.” _

_ “Do I have those?” _

_ “Sure, ever’body does nearly. I jus’ prefer ‘em to my array sometimes.” _

_ Landguard reached in, unsure, and Judge nodded. “You can touch ‘em, sweet thing. It’s okay.” _

_ Landguard’s fingertips brushed over their surfaces and Judge lowered his own hands, instead opting to put them on Landguard’s hips and drew him closer. _

_ “Jus’... jus’ pinch ‘em a little,” Judge breathed, and Landguard carefully took them between his fingers and thumb and squeezed lightly.  _

_ “Ohh,” Judge groaned, tipping his helm up to capture Landguard’s lips in a kiss. “Yeah. Like that. Mmm.” _

_ Landguard repeatedly pinched the clusters, a little charge creeping up his fingers. The pleased noises Judge made created a ball of hot desire in Landguard’s tanks, and he readily pressed closer, still manipulating the clusters. _

_ “Yeah, jus’... jus’ a little more,” Judge moaned breathily. _

_ “Landguard!” _

_ The call of his carrier made Landguard freeze. Have they been caught? _

_ “Oh, don’ stop,” Judge rasped, and Landguard tentatively started manipulating again.  _

_ He found that the more intensely he pinched, the shakier Judge became until he was biting down on Landguard’s collar, helm bowed. Charge crackled over Landguard’s fingers, spreading slowly up his arms until it ebbed and disappeared back into Judge’s frame. _

_ “Slag, Landguard,” Judge breathed, sinking against the wall of the shed. “Jus’ like that. Just like that.” _

_ Landguard smiled brightly down at him and was rewarded with many, many passionate kisses.  _

_ He was late to dinner. _

The next memories were flashes of thought, of sweet nothings and a few fiery, passionate nights under the stars in the night garden.

_ They had met early in the vorn while the cyberflora was flourishing and growing rampantly, but as the vorn progressed the growth slowed and eventually stopped in preparation for the dormant period in their growth cycle. _

There weren’t enough vines, looking back. Not nearly enough to cover up their clandestine act. 

_ “Mm, Landguard, yer always so hot’n wet fer me.” _

_ “I, I like taking your spike,” Landguard groaned, helm tipping back and giving Judge adequate room to suckle on his cables. _

_ “Don’t love it?” _

_ “I save my love for you, not your spike,” Landguard purred playfully, glancing down and receiving a kiss on the lips for his trouble. _

_ One of Landguard’s hands was buried in Judge’s chest pinching a neural cluster while the other clung to his shoulder. One of Landguard’s legs was wrapped around Judge’s solid hips pistoning away into his valve. _

_ “Glad ta hear it.” _

_ A blink of color of Judge’s shoulder caught Landguard’s optic but it faded too fast to truly recognize it for what it was. Helm falling back again, he enjoyed the build of his own overload while he could feel Judge’s building between his fingers.  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ Close, close—  _

_ “Landguard!” _

_ His sparker burst into their union, shoving Judge away while his carrier stepped between him and Judge’s prone frame.  _

_ “How dare you,” his sparker blustered. “Taking advantage of my son. You make me sick.” _ __   
_   
_ __ “I wasn’t—”

_ “He’s young! What does he know? You ought to have shown more restraint,” his carrier spat. “Take— take him out. I never want to see him here ever again.” _

_ His sparker dragged Judge to his feet, lip curling in disgust at his still-exposed spike. _

_ “Put that dirty thing away,” his sparker snarled.  _

_ “Landguard—” _

_ “Judge!”  _

_ Landguard tried to move around his carrier but he froze when they whipped around and glared up at him, optics piercing and hard. “Don’t you move, youngling. We’re not finished with you yet. Cover yourself, it’s indecent.” _

_ Cheeks burning with hot tears and embarrassment, Landguard forced his plating shut and hunched over, trying to be as small as possible. _

_ A single databurst reached his processor before Judge was dragged out of sight. _

_...  _

_ My sweet one, _

_ They will tell you ugly things. _

_ Know I never meant to hurt you. _

_ I do care for you. _

_ Always yours, _

_ Judge _

_... _

The memory fades and Landguard draws his feet up onto the berth, hugging his knees with one arm.

“They thought he was trying to... bond into higher status,” Landguard mumbled, voice almost too low to hear. “I loved him.”

Icefall slowly pushes himself up and releases Landguard’s hand. Great, yeah, he’s leaving— 

Icefall sticks his legs over the side of the berth, one on either side of Landguard before he’s hugging him tight around the middle, burying his face into Landguard’s neck. Unsure at first, Landguard puts his hand on Icefall’s arm before he detects the little sniffles of barely-concealed weeping.

“Hey,” Landguard lamely murmurs. “It’s okay... Icefall, it’s past.”

“Doesn’t make it any less sad,” Icefall manages, snuffling and wiping his optics before he hugs Landguard tighter. “Or beautiful. You’ve had love, Landguard. Real love.”

It is only after several minutes of weeping that Icefall manages to calm somewhat. “And... and...”

Landguard looks back at him. “And?” he quietly presses.

“And I-I want that,” Icefall whispers. “I w-want you to have th-that with me.”

Landguard turns in his embrace and it’s his turn to pull Icefall in.

“I... want to have that too,” he mumbles. 

Together they curl up on the berth, held close in their mutual embrace. The memory of Judge fades as Landguard takes in Icefall’s fluctuating EM field and their sparks pulsing in the bond. 

He has loved.

But he can love again.


End file.
